I hate Thursdays.....
Why must my worst memories always happen on Thursdays!!!!??!?!?!
Last night we had a terrible fight, the second worst in 2 months. He suggested to order dinner and treat his parents to a meal at their flat. And he told me to call his mom to fix the date. I was still working at that time, and seriously trying to rush through my jobs so as to be in time to pick him up on my way home. But nonetheless, I agreed to call. Honestly speaking, I was really busy, I had nearly forgotten to call because my mind was really on something else. When I called, I asked her if she can go back for dinner and so on....once she said she is fine we hung up. Then I quickly finished up what I was doing and rush off to hail a cab.
I picked it him up and we headed home. He asked about our dinner and so I said I called his mom and we are a go for it. Then he asked if his dad was informed. Honestly speaking, this is the first time I tried to organize a dinner with his parents, I really did not know I had to inform both party separately (it wasn't so with my family). So I told him I did not, and do I need to do it now. He said it was Ok, anyway it was too late and he think his mom will be informing his dad about it. So we dropped the issue.
When nearing dinner, he suddenly received a call from his dad. After putting down the phone, he angrily threw his phone onto his desk. I was taken aback. When I asked him what happened, he didn't reply me but just called his mom to tell her that Dad called him and scolded him for not telling him earlier about our dinner arrangement. He said this was to be his treat to them, yet Dad can scold him about it. After hanging up, he turned to me and started scolding me. Asked me why I did not call his dad, it is such common sense when organising a dinner. Why I did not do a good job. Why I did not tell his mom to inform his dad. I apologized sincerely as I really did not know their family culture is such. But after apologizing, his scoldings won't stop. He kept repeating why I did not call Dad. I blew up. And I seriously warned him to watch his words, cos I did told him about it on the cab and he had said he didn't think calling Dad then was necessary. If so, why only start blaming me now when things had worsened? We could have done something just now in the cab to salvage the situation if he thinks that something was amissed. If he chose (and it was his choice) that nothing need to be done then, he shouldn't start blaming everything on me now.
Once I snapped, he got more angry and started ordering me and ballowing at me. He wanted me to answer his questions immediately, say sorry whenever needed, look at him, give him a good attitude, talk in a good tone.....etc....
Obviously, I couldn't. I was fuming mad. Who in this state of mind is able to 'give a good attitude' and 'apolgoize sincerely' without even raising an eyebrow? I didn't even feel like looking at his stuck-up, attitude face. He saw me not looking at him but at my thinkpad, so he pushed my thinkpad purposely. This thinkpad is what I use for work. He is so childish as to 'play' with it. He even threatened to throw it out of the window if I look at it again. I snapped even further. I just can't stand this kind of senseless behaviour. Come on, this is plainly acting like a child who doesn't know what's the seriousness of spoiling a work station, who for his own satisfaction, disregards all other issues and throws his tantrum around spoiling things! It's really super low-class and pea-brain!
I scolded him really loud. He then picked up the wine bottle that we used to hold drinking water and gested to throw at me or smashed it with the table. I was really angry. In my family where I grew up, nobody ever ever do this kinda things. It is only supposed to appear in tv serials and movies. I stomped off to the room. He followed, kicking the door with his foot, and banging it to order me to open. I opened, he started shouting into my face, and pushed me real hard onto the bed. I fell onto the bed and then off it as the impact was too big! He didn't seem to be concerned, just kept ordering me to behave and answer his questions to his liking. He shouted and waved the wine bottle, half intending to smashed the bottle into my head. I had to obey, although fuming inside. I need to save myself. I had no choice. I married a mad man!!!!!
He didn't even allow me to cry!!!!
Although after that, he took the initiative to come into the room and apologize, it's already too late. I don't feel that he had changed for the better (after the Thursday 1 & 1/2 months back, where we quarrelled and he slammed me to the ground and hurt my head). He admited that it was his fault and he shouldn't have shouted, but he still pushed the blame on me that I should not react to his shoutings. When one apologize but followed by further blamings, I seriously think we are getting no where. He was not sorry at all. He said I reacted to his shoutings, and thus he reacted by even more violent behaviour cos he couldn't stand it. And so he believed that I was mostly at fault for the situation to worsen. He actually thinks that he has the right to react to my reactions, but if I reacted to his, I'm not right. If his start-off point is such, I really don't think he was sorry at all. No use talking to someone who on one hand keep saying sorry cos he started a row. But on the other hand, blames you for getting angry over his shoutings, and as a matter of fact, for all other matters as well. Subconsciously, I think he still feels that whatever happened, I am still at fault more than he is. We are just jogging on the spot after the hour's chat.
We are going in circles!!!! A never ending circle!!!!
Last night we had a terrible fight, the second worst in 2 months. He suggested to order dinner and treat his parents to a meal at their flat. And he told me to call his mom to fix the date. I was still working at that time, and seriously trying to rush through my jobs so as to be in time to pick him up on my way home. But nonetheless, I agreed to call. Honestly speaking, I was really busy, I had nearly forgotten to call because my mind was really on something else. When I called, I asked her if she can go back for dinner and so on....once she said she is fine we hung up. Then I quickly finished up what I was doing and rush off to hail a cab.
I picked it him up and we headed home. He asked about our dinner and so I said I called his mom and we are a go for it. Then he asked if his dad was informed. Honestly speaking, this is the first time I tried to organize a dinner with his parents, I really did not know I had to inform both party separately (it wasn't so with my family). So I told him I did not, and do I need to do it now. He said it was Ok, anyway it was too late and he think his mom will be informing his dad about it. So we dropped the issue.
When nearing dinner, he suddenly received a call from his dad. After putting down the phone, he angrily threw his phone onto his desk. I was taken aback. When I asked him what happened, he didn't reply me but just called his mom to tell her that Dad called him and scolded him for not telling him earlier about our dinner arrangement. He said this was to be his treat to them, yet Dad can scold him about it. After hanging up, he turned to me and started scolding me. Asked me why I did not call his dad, it is such common sense when organising a dinner. Why I did not do a good job. Why I did not tell his mom to inform his dad. I apologized sincerely as I really did not know their family culture is such. But after apologizing, his scoldings won't stop. He kept repeating why I did not call Dad. I blew up. And I seriously warned him to watch his words, cos I did told him about it on the cab and he had said he didn't think calling Dad then was necessary. If so, why only start blaming me now when things had worsened? We could have done something just now in the cab to salvage the situation if he thinks that something was amissed. If he chose (and it was his choice) that nothing need to be done then, he shouldn't start blaming everything on me now.
Once I snapped, he got more angry and started ordering me and ballowing at me. He wanted me to answer his questions immediately, say sorry whenever needed, look at him, give him a good attitude, talk in a good tone.....etc....
Obviously, I couldn't. I was fuming mad. Who in this state of mind is able to 'give a good attitude' and 'apolgoize sincerely' without even raising an eyebrow? I didn't even feel like looking at his stuck-up, attitude face. He saw me not looking at him but at my thinkpad, so he pushed my thinkpad purposely. This thinkpad is what I use for work. He is so childish as to 'play' with it. He even threatened to throw it out of the window if I look at it again. I snapped even further. I just can't stand this kind of senseless behaviour. Come on, this is plainly acting like a child who doesn't know what's the seriousness of spoiling a work station, who for his own satisfaction, disregards all other issues and throws his tantrum around spoiling things! It's really super low-class and pea-brain!
I scolded him really loud. He then picked up the wine bottle that we used to hold drinking water and gested to throw at me or smashed it with the table. I was really angry. In my family where I grew up, nobody ever ever do this kinda things. It is only supposed to appear in tv serials and movies. I stomped off to the room. He followed, kicking the door with his foot, and banging it to order me to open. I opened, he started shouting into my face, and pushed me real hard onto the bed. I fell onto the bed and then off it as the impact was too big! He didn't seem to be concerned, just kept ordering me to behave and answer his questions to his liking. He shouted and waved the wine bottle, half intending to smashed the bottle into my head. I had to obey, although fuming inside. I need to save myself. I had no choice. I married a mad man!!!!!
He didn't even allow me to cry!!!!
Although after that, he took the initiative to come into the room and apologize, it's already too late. I don't feel that he had changed for the better (after the Thursday 1 & 1/2 months back, where we quarrelled and he slammed me to the ground and hurt my head). He admited that it was his fault and he shouldn't have shouted, but he still pushed the blame on me that I should not react to his shoutings. When one apologize but followed by further blamings, I seriously think we are getting no where. He was not sorry at all. He said I reacted to his shoutings, and thus he reacted by even more violent behaviour cos he couldn't stand it. And so he believed that I was mostly at fault for the situation to worsen. He actually thinks that he has the right to react to my reactions, but if I reacted to his, I'm not right. If his start-off point is such, I really don't think he was sorry at all. No use talking to someone who on one hand keep saying sorry cos he started a row. But on the other hand, blames you for getting angry over his shoutings, and as a matter of fact, for all other matters as well. Subconsciously, I think he still feels that whatever happened, I am still at fault more than he is. We are just jogging on the spot after the hour's chat.
We are going in circles!!!! A never ending circle!!!!
posted by Caller From The Falls at 10:22 AM
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